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Mourning Max

25 Jul

I really feel like a major Debbie Downer blogger lately, but I figured since my memories of my big brother are permanently out here on the interwebs, I should also create a semi-permanent 1378071_10153348981200551_615562441_nmemorial to my 2nd hairiest best friend whom I also lost recently: My little pup, Max. Even typing his name here now and remembering him is causing tears to start to leak out of my face. I’m gonna need a box of Kleenex. Hang on.

…….

………..

(Insert Jeopardy! theme here)

……

Ok, I’m back. Who knew it’d be so hard to find Kleenex in this house? Apparently I’m not very snotty.

Anyway… You know, I always thought those people who took days off work to mourn the loss of a pet were insane. Until my Max. I’ve had dogs my entire life, but I don’t think I’ve ever loved any like I loved my Max. I fell in love with his little tiny furry Ewok face the first time I laid eyes on him as a pup, sitting alone in his cage, the last left of his litter. Actually, I should say WE fell in love with him, and by ‘we’, I mean, of course, my roommate, who is Max’s daddy. I suppose he loved him as much as I did. It was sorta hard not to. He was our baby. Our alarm clock. Our snuggle buddy. The dog who once tried to bite my face off. Our spoiled little lovable brat. Max could make me laugh on my worst day; The way he spun around in excited circles whenever we’d say the word ‘outside’, or ‘bone’; The way he’d wake us up by standing on top of us and staring directly into our faces; The way he growled every time we tried to kiss him, almost like he was saying “C’mon, I’m not a little kid any more!”. I loved him more than I even know how to express. So when he was diagnosed with cancer, we vowed we’d spend any amount of money and do whatever it took to keep him with us as long as possible. When he stopped eating, we syringe fed him baby food, heavy cream, Pedialite- Anything to try to bring back our healthy, energetic little pup. But as it turns out, Max was more tired than we thought. Odd timing, the fact that he started to go severely downhill the night my big brother passed, almost as if he knew that Jon needed a companion.

His last day on Earth was spent at his favorite park, and snuggling on the couch with us- His two favorite pastimes. I remember he kept looking at us with his big brown eyes, like he was trying to comfort us and tell us it was going to be ok. I think I told him I loved him approximately 8,428 times that day. I take comfort in the fact that I’m pretty sure he knew how lucky he was and how much he was loved. I mean, what other dog gets steak and eggs for breakfast while his mom eats Special K? He had a great life. A great life that was cut way too short.

So now, we grieve. Every day. I miss how happy I felt when Jon and Max were both here, even though I’m slowly but surely recovering. I cry for my brother, for my dog, and I hope and pray that they’re up there together, just waiting for me to get there. Hopefully Jon knows how to cook a steak. Because Max loves that shit.

Love you forever, little Max. Momma and Daddy miss you.

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7 Comments

Posted by on July 25, 2014 in Cancer, Humor, Life

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

7 responses to “Mourning Max

  1. toni596

    July 25, 2014 at 10:21 pm

    So, so sorry!

    Liked by 1 person

     
  2. Farmer Farthing

    July 25, 2014 at 10:40 pm

    😦 RIP Max xx

    Liked by 1 person

     
  3. Kathleen

    July 26, 2014 at 1:12 am

    I am so sorry for your loss, of both Max AND of your brother. I think that you are amazing that you can still get up in the morning.

    I read this post and then read the 3 suggested “related posts” (I’m way behind) I read “Furry man of the house”m “Santa, you’re gonna need a bigger bag”, “Go home cancer, you’re drunk” and then “My brotha from the same motha”. And now I too am grieving your your brother. It’s not fair. Your GREAT brother dies and my jackhole of a brother lives. I would have gladly made the trade. Trust me, no one would miss him. Really . . . ask around. — But I digress.

    I am glad you now understand why people like me consider their dogs their children. And yes, when mine pass it will be like losing a child for me. I have two dog children right now, and they are both big dogs and both OLD. They were both born in 2000. I am trying to prepare myself for them being gone. — (There are pics on a page on my blog.).

    I just wanted to tell you that my heart aches FOR you. Cancer SUCKS, and it’s not fair your awesome brother is gone. It’s just not fair.

    ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

     
    • paulasg75

      July 26, 2014 at 10:25 pm

      Thank you so much. It really isn’t fair. But it just reminds me that we’ve only got one shot here, and it can all be over at any time. So by God, I’m gonna get out there and do some stuff now. I think I’ll learn to tap dance. I’ve always wanted to learn to tap dance. I’m gonna be on Broadway.

      Like

       
  4. longchaps2

    July 28, 2014 at 3:50 pm

    This is heart rending. You’ve taken a one-two punch to the heart. No wonder you haven’t felt like blogging. I also just lost a beloved pet. A horse I had for fifteen years. It’s like losing a part of yourself when they go. I miss him every day, but I try to picture him running free without pain and it helps. Again, I’m sorry for your loss Paula, and I applaud your decision to get our there and do some stuff now. Keeping busy is a good idea. Let us know when you have your first performance on Broadway. We’ll come applaud you!

    Liked by 1 person

     
    • paulasg75

      July 29, 2014 at 10:11 pm

      I’m gonna be HUGE! A one-woman show, entitled ‘Why Is It Always So Sweaty Under My Boobs?’. I like it.

      Liked by 1 person

       
      • longchaps2

        July 30, 2014 at 3:49 pm

        Catchy title. Yeah. I like it too, lol.

        Liked by 1 person

         

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